Hadith vs. Sunnah ft. ‪‪@habeeb_akande1‬

 

The Prophetic Hajj: A Pilgrimage of Mercy – Abdal Hakim Murad

 

Are we truly following the Sunnah?

 

The Prophet ﷺ used to pray and he was holding his granddaughter Umamah, the daughter of his ﷺ daughter Zaynab رضي الله عنها. When he ﷺ would make sajdah, he would put her down, and when he ﷺ would stand, he would pick her up. (Bukhari) 

The scholar alFakahaani, as cited in Fathul Bari, mentions that it’s as if the secret in his ﷺ carrying Umamah in his prayer was to push against the narrative that the Arabs used to have in disliking girls and holding them. 

So he ﷺ opposed that culture emphatically, even in [such an important space as salah], because action is stronger than simply speaking about it.

He ﷺ actively demonstrated how to honor girls. How to include daughters in religious spaces ﷺ How to create a access for women. 

Today, the misogynistic practices and policies in some Muslim communities rivals the ignorance of the pre-Islamic Arabian society that the Quran was revealed to transform. 

While many men and women who are scholars and activists are actively working to create change to return us to the uplifting community practices of the Prophet ﷺ, how should our own religious leadership demonstrate this commitment to actively portraying honoring daughters and the women they become as our leader ﷺ did?

Maryam Amir's page of FB

THE SUNNAH OUR UMMAH FAILS TO IMPLEMENT...

 1. It is sunnah to marry older women.
 2. It is sunnah to marry a divorced person.
 3. It is sunnah to marry a widow.
 4. It is sunnah to help women with household chores, such as cooking, cleaning, washing, etc.
 5. Put food in your wife's mouth as an expression of love.  (classified as a form of charity)
 6. It is sunnah to express your love, gratitude and respect to your wife.
 7. It is sunnah to forgive her for her mistakes.
 8. It is the sunnah to keep your wife looking good, to gift her, kiss her, foreplay with her, give her a seperate housing if you can afford it.
 9. It is a sunnah to try to know your wife's feelings and to comfort her when she needs it.
 10. It is a sunnah to have fun together.  (running, storytelling, sharing a happy occasion with her are well known examples)
 11. It is the sunnah to lie down and relax in your wife's lap, to smile at her, to compliment her, to flirt with her and let her play with your beard.
 12. It is sunnah to call your wife with beautiful names.
 13. It is a sunnah not to divulge her secrets to family or friends.
 14. It is the sunnah to love and respect the parents of one's wife.
15. It is the sunnah to protect your wife and your children from your toxic family or your mother and father if they are abusing her.
 Let us practice the sunnah in its entirety and not to measure.
🤲 May Allah bless Muslim women with Qawwam who fears Allah - Allahumma ameen!
The meaning of a Qawwam is a man who protects you financially, physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally. Who literally takes you under the fortress of his protection.

Umm Salama (ra): A Separated Family (Part 1) | The Firsts by Dr. Omar Suleiman

Umm Ayman: The Woman Who Never Stopped Caring | The Firsts with Sh. Omar Suleiman

Karen Armstrong: The Prophet Muhammad's Compassion

An Open Letter to Muslim Men: The Sunnah Trumps Toxic Masculinity

Excerpt from article by Prof. Jonathan A.C Brown

In light of ongoing debates about differences between sexes and expectations of gender roles, it’s worth looking at how the men and women of Islam’s ideal, founding generation conducted themselves. In the Qur’an and the teachings of the Prophet ﷺ, men and women are distinct in their duties of prayer and fasting (women don’t do either when menstruating), in their dress (they must cover different areas of their body), and other legal issues. Men have the duty to guard and protect (qiwāma) their womenfolk because of some of the capacities that God generally grants one sex to a greater degree than the other.

But what surprised me when I reflected on it was how little difference there was otherwise between the conduct of men and women in this noble community. Both were deeply pious, decisive, courageous in word and deed, proud of themselves but humbled by the charge God put upon them, confident when they believed they were right but also utterly deferential to the instructions of God and His Messenger ﷺ. Both were dynamically involved in public life. And both men and women were extremely conscious of their code of sexual propriety. Aisha رضي الله عنها became a major political leader in the first decades of the Muslim community and one of its most respected sources of knowledge. When the Prophet’s ﷺ wife Umm Salama رضي الله عنها heard him addressing the people outside, she went out to join the crowd. When she was asked why she thought she was meant to attend, she replied, “Are we not among the people?”During the caliphate of ʿUmar رضي الله عنه, a female Companion interrupted his Friday sermon to correct him on a point, and he admitted she was right. A whole slew of female Companions fought in battle, the most notable among them Nuṣayba bint Kaʿb رضي الله عنها, who defended the Prophet ﷺ with her sword at the Battle of Uhud and later died on campaign. The great enemy of the Prophet ﷺ, Abū Lahab, was killed by Umm al-Faḍl رضي الله عنها, who smashed his head with a tent-pole. During the Battle of the Trench, Ṣafiyya bint ʿAbd al-Muṭṭalib رضي الله عنها was among the people defending the small fort of Fāriʿ. When the senior man there would not go out and confront an enemy soldier who was about to find the fort’s secret entrance, Ṣafiyya took matters into her own hands. She leapt on him from the fort’s walls and clubbed him to death. But she demanded that one of her male comrades strip off his weapons and armor since he was an unrelated man she would never touch with her own hands.

The Prophet ﷺ and his community did not leave a legacy of ‘Traditional Man’s Men’ and subservient women. Their legacy is one of courageous, committed, humble, and engaged individuals, men and women alike. At their head was not an angry alpha male whose masculinity made him mock or subordinate others. He ﷺ was a man who saw that a man’s role is to serve his family and that letting others serve you is something a real man would prefer to avoid.

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Think polygamy is sunnah? Read this first

Polygamy is one of those things that always seems to come up when discussing Islam. Be it in banterous conversations between a husband and wife (which never end too well!) or during a serious discussion circle between ‘akhis’ on a Friday night. Lots of Muslim guys justify their interest in polygamy by saying “it’s Sunnah.” But here are some other Sunnahs of how the Prophet conducted polygamy to think about doing first:

1) Stay monogamous for 25 years, and only practice polygamy after your first wife passes away
The Prophet was married to only Khadijah, his first wife for 25 years. He only married other women after she passed away, and even then he reminisced about her, even showing particular love for anyone who used to visit him in the days of Khadijah, just out of the positive association. It’s almost as if a romantic monogamous marriage is the norm, and polygamy came as a dispensation afterwards.

2) Marry a widow
Most of the Prophet’s wives – 8 out of 13 – were widows. Khadijah had been married – and widowed – twice before. If you’re so keen on the Sunnah of polygamy, please be as keen on the Sunnah of marrying widows. Unfortunately, we are very selective about the sunnahs we like and the sunnahs we ignore. It’s a crime that a widow or a divorcee is seen as ‘less than’ a previously unmarried woman by many Muslims. That’s the Sunnah of Shaitan.

3) Marry a woman 15 years older than you
When they got married, Khadijah was 40, and the Prophet was 25. Not quite a Macron-sized age gap, but still significant. When was the last time you went to a Muslim wedding where the bride was 15 years older than the groom? Single guys reading this: what would your parents say if you wanted to marry a woman 15 years older than you? If the answer is anything other than “masha’ Allah, that’s Sunnah”… then we have a problem.

4) Marry an old widow with 5 children from a previous marriage
Sawda bint Zam’a had children from a previous marriage – some narrations say five or six sons! When her and the Prophet married, there was great surprise in Mecca that Muhammad would choose to marry a widow who was neither young nor beautiful. The Prophet, however, remembered the trials she went through for the sake of her religion, immigrating to Abyssinia and leaving everything behind. When was the last time you saw that in the “what I’m looking for” section of MuzMatch?

5) Marry a woman richer than you, who is an international entrepreneur
Khadijah was a wealthy, international businesswoman – basically, if she was alive now, she’d be starring in Dragon’s Den or The Apprentice. The Prophet worked for her. She asked him to marry her. This is literally the opposite of an older man proposing to a young girl who hasn’t developed her career yet, and then asking her to ‘look after the house’ as if she’s some kind of structural engineer. Do you think maybe the Prophet was trying to teach us something? He was given knowledge of his ummah’s actions by Allah – so he knew then the state we would be in now. What do you think he was trying to tell us?

6) Marry a Jewish woman
Two of the Prophet’s wives – Rayhana bint Zayd and Safiyya bint Huyayy – were Jewish.

7) Marry a Christian woman
Maria Al-Qibtiyya was a Coptic Christian from Egypt. It is because of her that the Prophet told the companions to “…treat its (Egypt’s) inhabitants well. For there lies upon you the responsibility because of blood-tie or relationship of marriage.”


Are these 7 Sunnahs of polygamy too difficult?

Maybe these 3 Sunnahs of married life should be easier to practice on wifey number 1:

1 – Do the housework
2 – Wash your own clothes
3 – Serve your own food
(All narrated in Sahih Bukhari)

So brothers if you’re planning to follow the sunnah of our beloved Prophet Muhammad regarding marriage and polygamy, please consider all of the above, and if after reading that you’re still game, mashallah you’re a better man than me!

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Ramadan Gems by Ustadh Nouman Ali Khan

Very nice new lectures from Brother Nouman in South Africa. We think everyone should listen to them as they are really basic stuff all Muslims should know. The playlist of lectures is embedded below. There are only 19 lectures though.

Follow the Sunnah of the greatest Step-father!

I have never heard this topic mentioned in a khutbah or taught about in seerah classes I have attended. This is such a shame, over the years so many brothers I have known simply refuse spouses because they do not want the hassle of another mans children. AstaghfiruAllah! But are very happy to follow the Sunnah and marry second wives ....this needs to addressed!

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An aspect of RasulAllah (sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam)'s life that very few people even think about is that he was a stepfather - a man who raised the children his wife had from her previous marriage.

Many cultures warn men against marrying widows or divorcees with children; insinuations are made that she could never be truly devoted to her new husband if she has her own children to care for. A bizarre, unhealthy rivalry is set up between the woman's child and her new husband.

When the Messenger of Allah (sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam) sent a proposal of marriage to Umm Salamah (radhiAllahu 'anha), she told him, "I am a woman with many children!" His response was, "And I am a man with children as well. Your children will be mine."

Umm Salamah had several children by her previous husband, Abu Salamah (radhiAllahu 'anhu), who had died from his war injuries. She was either pregnant, or had just given birth to her daughter Zaynab, when her husband died.

Zaynab bint Abi Salamah (radhiAllahu 'anha) thus grew up with RasulAllah as the only father she truly knew. He, in turn, loved her as his own child. When RasulAllah would come to Umm Salamah's house, he would immediately ask for young Zaynab; he would play with her often.

Zaynab's uncle, Ammar, used to say, "She was the one who has come between RasulAllah and the rest of his family!" - meaning that he would spend a great deal of time with her.

Zaynab bint Abi Salamah (radhiAllahu 'anha) grew up to narrate many ahadith, in particular from her mother and from the other wives of RasulAllah (sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam). She also became known as a great jurist of Madinah, and was referred to as the most knowledgeable woman of her time.

From The Salafi Feminist

Secret marriages are forbidden in Islam

In the name of Allah, the Gracious, the Merciful
It is a condition of a sound marriage that it be announced and attested to publicly. A secret marriage, which is only witnessed by a few people in private, is potentially harmful to those affected by it, as it almost always involves deception, and it is even more so if a man marries an additional wife in secret and without her consent.

Allah said:

فَانكِحُوهُنَّ بِإِذْنِ أَهْلِهِنَّ وَآتُوهُنَّ أُجُورَهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ مُحْصَنَاتٍ غَيْرَ مُسَافِحَاتٍ وَلَا مُتَّخِذَاتِ أَخْدَانٍ
Marry them with the permission of their families and give them their due as is good, chaste women, neither fornicators nor secret mistresses.
Surat al-Nisa 4:25

Scholars have said that this verse prohibits secret marriages, by drawing an analogy between a ‘secret mistress’ and a secret marriage.

Ibn Taymiyyah writes:
وَمَالِكٌ يُوجِبُ إعْلَانَ النِّكَاحِ وَنِكَاحُ السِّرِّ هُوَ مِنْ جِنْسِ نِكَاحِ الْبَغَايَا وَقَدْ قَالَ اللَّهُ تَعَالَى مُحْصَنَاتٍ غَيْرَ مُسَافِحَاتٍ وَلَا مُتَّخِذَاتِ أَخْدَانٍ
فَنِكَاحُ السِّرِّ مِنْ جِنْسِ ذَوَاتِ الْأَخْدَانِ

Malik obligated announcing the marriage in public. A secret marriage is a type of prostitution. Allah Almighty said: Chaste women, neither fornicators nor secret mistresses. (4:25) Thus, a secret marriage is a type of secret mistress.
Source: Majmū’ al-Fatāwá 32/102

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Making Muslim Women Stay at Home Is Against Prophetic Example

Dear Wallah Bro,

There will come a time in your life when you’ve established your iman, graduated college, stabilized your finances and have secured a job. You might feel like you’re ready to find someone special. When that time comes, please don’t expect that someone to be any less established than you are.

Muslim women aren’t molded and utilized to fulfill your desired outcome. I don’t mean to be so crude, but the belief held by some cultures within the Muslim community sees women as moving factories meant to produce children. How could you expect a woman to raise a family when she isn’t developed herself, or worse, you hinder her development as a person and woman? We can’t enable the ummah to progress if a bulk of the community remains immobilized at home. As a Muslim woman, I seek to share my talents with the world, something I can’t always do within the four walls of my house. I have the right to share my knowledge just like any male member of the household.

There is a stigma within some subcultures surrounding the success of its women that has led to an expectation where we must remain in supportive roles while our counterparts flourish. Nowhere in Islam does it say that women must remain uneducated and stay sheltered within the confines of the household. Rather, the Qur’an says, “Whoever goes out seeking knowledge, then he is in Allah’s cause until he returns.” (Jami` at-Tirmidhi volume 1, Book 39, Hadith 2647). Islam clearly does not limit knowledge and privilege to men, so for the brothers who misleadingly continue to use the Quran as a way to limit girls and women of their community, remember what the Qur’an says. “Your wives are a garment for you, and you are a garment for them.” (Qur’an 2:187)

God states it clearly and simply: men and women are equal. Having educated Muslim women isn’t a novel 21st-century innovation: Islam has always stated that Muslim women are to be treated as equals to men in all aspects of society. In fact,  Prophet Muhammad’s wife Khadijah was a highly-educated businesswoman and athlete. If it worked for the Prophet (PBUH) 1,400 years ago, then it shouldn’t be an issue now.

We have antidotes and commands from the Qur’an and sunnah — the real issue is committing to following these examples. Just like you perform your prayers and give charity, you must also respect the rights of Muslim women.

We are enablers for progress. Not only do we have the power to create new generations, but we are also innovators in society. Islam has always injected feminism into society, so it’s time some of our brothers get with the program.

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Yasmin Mogahed's at the Tarbiya Institute - Muhammad: The Eternal Illuminator

The Neglected Sunnahs - Shaykh Hamza Yusuf

Why do mosques keep pretending that men and women don’t hang out outside of the mosque?

As a child, I would run laughing through the mosque as if the entire building was my playground.

When your mother is an influential leader in the community and your dad one of the regular faces at the mosque, you’re welcomed everywhere. You become “the darling.” You are doted on by aunties who squeeze your cheeks and rain down blessings on you, while the uncles always have treats for you in their pockets, and ready to play fun games with you between prayer times.

But as I grew older and puberty loomed, my world became smaller as the areas I could roam steadily shrunk.

I was no longer allowed downstairs (the biggest part of the mosque). The uncles stopped smiling at me altogether. I was suddenly restricted to the “back room.”

Despite this, I would still hang around in the corridors chatting to my brother and the boys I had once played with. After all, this was my kingdom. I’d grown up in this mosque so why should I suddenly be denied the friendships and freedom of my youth.

Inevitably, I would then be reprimanded by some man who found my presence and easy manner with the opposite sex offensive as he shooed me into the sister’s area where he thought I belonged.

The whole charade exasperated me and bored me to tears, because that’s exactly what it was, a charade. I saw those men and women outside the walls of the mosque and their behavior was different. Less guarded. More casual. Empty of the pretense and protocol that governed them within the walls of their religious institution. I saw the men chatting with women in the street and sometimes saw them hand in hand with those women.

For example, the concept of “lowering your gaze” is just that, a concept, yet some men have taken it as a literal rule and refuse to look into the eyes of a woman in the mosque. I remember during Ramadan our mosque would serve dinner every night, and a group of us would always help, passing dishes from the men into the women’s section. One man would pass me plates of food, head turned away from me, eyes completely averted and looking at the floor. Incidentally, I never took it as a sign of respect. I will never take it as a sign of respect. It’s a distortion of a simple statement designed to respect women. They have taken it too far.

They have turned this concept into an irrational normality.

To segregate so completely is an insult to both genders. We are assuming that men are so lacking in control around women that they must be cordoned off. It does women a disservice and dehumanizes them to exaggerate sexual temptation so much so that we must be kept hidden.

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The Role of Sunnah and Classical Scholarship - Dr. Jonathan Brown

One of my fave scholars. :)

Are You the Husband Allah Describes? - Khutbah by Nouman Ali Khan

Stop telling Muslim teens that mixing genders is some kind of fitna

Two minutes after we settled into our chairs, one of the MYNA volunteers told us we needed to sit separately, boys on one side of the room and girls on the other.

My younger cousin voiced it perfectly when he simply declared to their faces, “That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.”

And he was right.

This was the only event I had been to that weekend that was gender segregated, which is bizarre. Why are we singling young people out with these regulations? In doing so, we assume some things about kids and teenagers. We create rules based on these assumptions, and we force a narrative of young people as characterized by wrong intentions and inappropriate interactions.

The worst part is that this kind of separation is not unique to this one event. It happens frequently in Muslim gatherings. I have been fortunate to have mostly been surrounded by progressive, active, well-rounded Muslims, so I personally don’t face this kind of situation often. But the fact is that it happens a lot. Too often.

It characterizes and defines many young Muslims’ childhoods and adolescence. This has serious implications on the culture of Muslim communities.

To separate young boys and girls is to sexualize their interactions immediately. It is to say that even sitting next to one another is in some way inappropriate. It teaches children that the only relationship between one another is sexual and therefore should be avoided. And it shouldn’t even really matter, but especially when we are sitting with our brothers, or cousins, or close friends we grew up with, to tell us that we might be giving strangers “the wrong idea” is ridiculous on so many levels.

Source

Side Entrance: Why Mosques Are Still Getting It Wrong

Do some people not like it? Every once in a while someone new will come and say this is haram. But you know what? This is closest to the Sunnah. Oh people are not as at the time of the Prophet ﷺ. Really? From my understanding, men used to go to the back rows at the time of the Prophet ﷺ and try to see the women through their legs when in prostration. That is when the Prophet ﷺ said that the best lines for men are at the front and the best lines for women are at the back. He didn’t say to build a wall or stick the women on another floor. The Quran says to lower your gaze and guard your modesty. Lower your gaze is stated first. You are responsible for your own actions. These are principles taught 1400+ years ago but which we have been practicing since, Insha Allah.

Are people uncomfortable with this? Of course there are women who are uncomfortable praying in there same room as men as it is foreign to them, so in order to make everyone comfortable and not infringe on the rights of any of the women, when we expanded the sisters area we expanded sideways in order to create a space with more privacy for those sisters who do not want to be in the same visible space as the men but still keeping the structure of the main prayer hall. Note, it wasn’t done in response to the men who complained. A mere bookshelf separates the area so there is free flow from the private part to the main sisters area. That is their preference and everyone is free to worship in the main area or in the more private areas, which is also very useful if nursing

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