The Evils of Backbiting in Islam: A Grave Sin with Far-Reaching Consequences

 

Backbiting, or ghibah in Arabic, is a serious moral and spiritual offense in Islam. It is more than just a breach of trust or a failure in social conduct; it is a sin that can damage relationships, tarnish reputations, and harm the soul. In Islam, backbiting is condemned in the strongest terms, and its harmful effects ripple through personal lives, communities, and the individual's relationship with Allah.

What is Backbiting?
Backbiting refers to speaking ill about someone behind their back, sharing information or criticisms they would not want disclosed. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) defined backbiting clearly when he said:

"Do you know what backbiting is?" They said, "Allah and His Messenger know best." He said, "It is to mention something about your brother that he would dislike." It was said, "What if what I say about my brother is true?" He said, "If what you say is true, you have backbitten him; and if it is not true, you have slandered him." (Sahih Muslim)

This Hadith underscores the gravity of backbiting, even if what is said is accurate. The fact that the person would feel hurt by the words is enough to make it sinful. Moreover, slander, which involves falsehood, is an even graver offense, equating to spreading lies that damage someone’s dignity and honor.

The Quran’s Clear Condemnation
The Quran explicitly condemns backbiting, comparing it to one of the most repulsive actions a person could commit. Allah says in the Quran:

"O you who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin. And do not spy or backbite each other. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his brother when dead? You would detest it. And fear Allah; indeed, Allah is Accepting of repentance and Merciful." (Surah Al-Hujurat 49:12)

This verse emphasizes the ugliness of backbiting by likening it to cannibalism, illustrating the repulsion a Muslim should feel towards this act. The metaphor of eating the flesh of a dead brother is striking, symbolizing how backbiting dehumanizes both the speaker and the victim.

The Spiritual Consequences
Backbiting not only damages interpersonal relationships, but it also harms one’s own spiritual standing. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) warned against the severity of this sin. In one narration, he said:

"Whoever protects the honor of his brother in his absence, Allah will protect his face from the Fire on the Day of Resurrection." (Tirmidhi)

This Hadith indicates the reward for those who avoid backbiting and, by extension, the punishment for those who engage in it. The act of backbiting strips away the spiritual protection a person has, leading to punishment in the Hereafter. Those who indulge in it not only risk the displeasure of Allah but also jeopardize their own salvation.

The Social Impact
Backbiting has a corrosive effect on society, breeding distrust and enmity. It sows discord among people, destroys friendships, and weakens the bonds of community. When backbiting becomes widespread, it cultivates an environment where everyone lives in fear of their reputation being attacked, creating a toxic atmosphere.

The Prophet (peace be upon him) stressed the importance of maintaining brotherhood and unity. He said:

"The Muslim is the one from whose tongue and hand the Muslims are safe." (Sahih al-Bukhari)

Thus, a Muslim's words should never cause harm to another person. Respecting the honor of fellow believers is central to Islamic ethics. Backbiting disrupts this ethical framework, leading to widespread mistrust and division.

How to Avoid Backbiting
It can sometimes be difficult to recognize when a conversation is crossing into backbiting, especially if the remarks seem harmless or justified. However, Muslims are encouraged to be vigilant in guarding their tongues and hearts. Here are a few practical steps to avoid falling into the trap of backbiting:

Mindfulness of Allah (Taqwa): Always remember that Allah is watching, and He hears every word spoken. Consciousness of Allah can help one restrain their tongue.

Change the Topic: If you find yourself or others engaging in backbiting, try to change the subject or gently remind everyone of the gravity of the sin.

Speak Positively or Remain Silent: The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, "Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day should speak good or remain silent." (Sahih al-Bukhari). Silence is preferable to words that harm.

Make Du'a for the Person: If you feel compelled to speak negatively about someone, stop yourself and instead make a supplication (du'a) for them. This will soften your heart and redirect your thoughts.

Repentance and Forgiveness
For those who have engaged in backbiting, it is crucial to seek Allah’s forgiveness and rectify the harm caused. Islam emphasizes both repentance (tawbah) and restitution in relationships. The victim of backbiting must be approached, and their forgiveness should be sought sincerely. In doing so, the person acknowledges their mistake and attempts to heal the wound they have inflicted.

Islam, in its mercy, always leaves the door open for those who sincerely seek to correct their actions. Allah is the Most Forgiving, and those who repent with sincerity can hope for His mercy.


Backbiting is more than a social misstep; it is a sin with profound spiritual, moral, and social consequences. Islam teaches Muslims to guard their tongues and honor the dignity of others. By avoiding backbiting, individuals not only protect their own souls but also contribute to a harmonious, trusting, and compassionate society. The best path is one of kindness, where Muslims are conscious of their words and work to foster love and unity within their communities.

The Prohibition of Gambling in Islam: A Moral and Spiritual Perspective

In the realm of Islamic teachings, the prohibition of gambling stands as a fundamental principle that upholds the spiritual and ethical well-being of believers. Gambling, often referred to as "maisir" in Arabic, encompasses a range of games of chance, betting, and speculative activities that are deemed haram, or forbidden, by Islamic scholars. This blog post delves into the reasons behind the prohibition of gambling in Islam, shedding light on its detrimental effects on individuals and society.

The Foundations of Islamic Morality:
Islam places a strong emphasis on ethical conduct and the development of a righteous character. The prohibition of gambling aligns with these core principles, as it fosters values such as honesty, hard work, and responsibility. Gambling, on the other hand, encourages the pursuit of wealth through chance rather than through honest labor, undermining the fabric of moral values that Islam seeks to uphold.

Risk of Exploitation and Injustice:
Gambling often preys on vulnerable individuals, enticing them with the prospect of quick riches while masking the harsh reality of substantial financial losses. This creates an environment where those who are economically disadvantaged are disproportionately affected, exacerbating social inequalities and contributing to a cycle of exploitation. Islam promotes social justice and equality, making the prohibition of gambling a crucial step in safeguarding the welfare of all members of society.

Deterioration of Family and Community Bonds:
Gambling can lead to the breakdown of family and community relationships. Individuals who become consumed by the pursuit of gambling are more likely to neglect their responsibilities to their families, leading to strained relationships, financial hardship, and emotional distress. Islam places immense importance on the institution of the family and the strength of communal bonds, making the avoidance of activities that threaten these connections imperative.

Erosion of Personal Character:
Islam emphasizes the development of self-discipline, self-control, and self-restraint. Engaging in gambling contradicts these values, as it encourages impulsive behavior, greed, and a lack of moderation. Such behaviors can lead to a degradation of one's character and moral compass, hindering personal growth and spiritual development.

The Impact on Mental and Emotional Well-being:
Studies have shown that gambling addiction can have severe negative effects on mental and emotional well-being. The stress, anxiety, and depression that often accompany gambling losses can have far-reaching consequences on an individual's overall quality of life. Islam promotes the preservation of physical and mental health, making the avoidance of activities that jeopardize well-being a fundamental aspect of the faith.

The prohibition of gambling in Islam is rooted in the preservation of moral, spiritual, and social well-being. It reflects the holistic approach that Islam takes towards human life, aiming to create a just and harmonious society where individuals can thrive both spiritually and materially. By understanding the underlying principles that guide the prohibition of gambling, believers can make informed choices that align with the teachings of Islam and contribute to their own personal growth and the betterment of society at large.

Forgiveness Despite Repeated Sins

Allah emphasizes His generosity and kindness, in that He forgives whoever repents to Him from whatever evil they commit: “If any one does evil or wrongs his own soul but afterwards seeks God’s forgiveness, he will find God Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful”. Surah 4 Verse 110 Ibn Abbas commented about this verse saying that Allah informs His servants of His forgiveness, forbearing generosity and expansive mercy. So, whoever commits a sin, whether major or minor, ‘but afterwards seeks Allah’s forgiveness, he will find Allah Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful’ even if his sins were greater than the heavens, the earth and the mountains.

It is also narrated by Ahmad that Abu Bakr said that Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said: ‘No Muslim commits a sin and then performs ablution, prays two rak’ahs and begs Allah for forgiveness for that sin, but He forgives him.’ If a believer makes mistakes, and we all do, we have to offer sincere repentance to be entitled to forgiveness. In Islam, sincere repentance is known as taubah. This requires us to; Recognize and admit we have made a mistake Ask forgiveness from Allah and if the sin was against a person, we have to ask forgiveness from that person also We try to atone for the sin we have done if possible, by for example, returning money if we had stolen it We make the intention never to do the sin again We are told many times in the Qur’an that Allah is the Oft-returning, Most Merciful. 

We understand from this that Allah is waiting for us to turn to Him in sincere repentance. If we are sincere, then Allah will have mercy on us. We are also advised to ‘follow a bad deed with a good deed’. This means, as soon as we realize we have done something wrong, we should immediately try to do something good. We should try to maintain the five times daily prayer, salat. This builds our relationship with Allah. During the prayer we recite the Fatiha in which we ask Allah for guidance. In a hadith Qudsi (conversation between Allah and His Prophet which is not part of Qur’an), it is explained that the prayer is divided into two parts, part is for Allah and part is for the worshipper. Allah promises to give the worshipper what s/he asks for – guidance! It is also necessary to read the Qur’an to understand and implement this guidance from Allah in our daily lives. Both Sahih Bukhari and Sahih Muslim record the hadith of Abu Sa’id (may Allah be pleased with him) that Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) told about the man who killed ninety-nine people. Later on, he regretted it and asked a worshipper, among the Children of Israel, whether he could repent. This worshiper told him no! So, he killed him, thus, completing one hundred. Then he asked one of their scholars whether he could repent. He said: ‘What is stopping you from repenting?’ 

Then he told him to go to a town where Allah was worshipped. He set out for that town, but death came to him while he was on the road. The angels of mercy and the angels of punishment disputed over him. So Allah commanded them to measure the distance between the two towns, and the place where he died. Whichever (town) he was closer to, when he died, was the one to which he belonged. They found he was closer to the town he was heading for. Thus, the angels of mercy took him. It was said that when he was dying, he moved himself – towards that town – while Allah commanded the good town to move closer to him and the other town to move away. On the other hand, al-Bukhari recorded that Ibn Abbas said that some of the people of shirk(associating partners with Allah) killed many people and committed zina, (illegal sexual acts) to a great extent. they came to Muhammad (pbuh) and said: ‘What you are saying and calling us to is good; if only you could tell us that there is an expiation (way of making amends) for what we have done.’ 

Then, the following verses were revealed: Those who, when they spend, are not extravagant and not niggardly, but hold a just (balance) between those (extremes); Those who invoke not, with God, any other god, nor slay such life as God has made sacred except for just cause, nor commit fornication; – and any that does this (not only) meets punishment. (But) the Penalty on the Day of Judgment will be doubled to him, and he will dwell therein in ignominy,- Unless he repents, believes, and works righteous deeds, for God will change the evil of such persons into good, and God is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful, Surah 25 Verses 67 – 70 Say: “O my Servants who have transgressed against their souls! Despair not of the Mercy of God: for God forgives all sins: for He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. “Turn ye to our Lord (in repentance) and bow to His (Will), before the Penalty comes on you: after that ye shall not be helped”. Surah 39 Verses 53 – 54 

We can understand from what has been said here that Allah forgives all sins provided that a person repents. Additionally, one must not despair of the mercy of Allah, even if their sins are many and great, for the door of repentance and mercy is expansive. “Know they not that God doth accept repentance from His votaries and receives their gifts of charity, and that God is verily He, the Oft-Returning, Most Merciful?” Surah 9 Verse 104 While we are still able to perform actions, it is never too late to turn to Allah. When we do, we should try to live as Muslims, that is, fulfilling all our obligations as Muslims. As our iman (faith) increases, so our knowledge, understanding and practicing of Islam improves, insha’Allah.

Read More on islamonline :

The Manners of The Believers: Covering The Mistakes of Your Brother | Shaykh Dr Yasir Qadhi

 

On the authority of Abu Huraira (may Allah be pleased with him) from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) who said, “Whoever relieves a believer’s distress of the distressful aspects of this world, Allah will rescue him from a difficulty of the difficulties of the Hereafter. Whoever alleviates [the situation of] one in dire straits who cannot repay his debt, Allah will alleviate his lot in both this world and in the Hereafter. Whoever conceals [the faults of] a Muslim, Allah will conceal [his faults] in this life and the Hereafter. Allah is helping the servant as long as the servant is helping his brother. Whoever follows a path in order to seek knowledge thereby, Allah will make easy doe him, due to it, a path to Paradise. No people gather together in a house of the houses of Allah, reciting the Book of Allah and studying it among themselves, except that tranquility descended upon them, mercy covers them, the angels surround them and Allah makes mention of them to those in His presence. Whoever is slowed by his deeds will not be hastened forward by his lineage.” (Recorded in Muslim)

“Whoever conceals [the faults of] a Muslim, Allah will conceal [his faults] in this life and the Hereafter.”

Ten Ways That Sins Are Forgiven | Shaykh Dr. Yasir Qadhi

What is The Difference Between Major & Minor Sins?

 

Sins We Commit When We’re Scared and Vulnerable | Khutbah

 

Conversations with Kanwal S3 | Episode 07 | Mom Shaming

 

Do not speak for God!

The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) told the story of two men, one of whom would commit sin and the other would strive to do his best in the world. When the man who exerted himself in worship continued to see the other in sin, he would say: "Refrain from (sinning)." The sinner replied: "Leave me alone with my Lord. Have you been sent as a watchman over me?"

The man who tried to do his best then said: "I swear by God, God will not forgive you, nor will He admit you to Paradise." When they both died and came before God, He told the man who had striven hard in worship: "Did you have knowledge about Me or had you power over that which I had in My hand?" God then said to the man who sinned: "Go and enter Paradise by My mercy." Sunan of Abu-Dawood

Socrates- Speak good or not at all

In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high esteem.
One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said, "Do you know what I just heard about your friend?"
"Hold on a minute," Socrates replied.
"Before telling me anything I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test."
"Triple filter?"
"That's right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what you're going to say. That's why I call it the triple filter test.
The first filter is Truth.
Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"
"No," the man said, "actually I just heard about it and..."
"All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not.
Now let's try the second filter, the filter of goodness.
“Is what you are about to tell me about my friend something good?"
"No, on the contrary... "
"So," Socrates continued, "you want to tell me something bad about him, but
you're not certain it's true. You may still pass the test though, because there's one filter left: the filter of usefulness.
Is what you want to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?"
"No, not really."
"Well," concluded Socrates, "If what you want to tell me is neither true nor good even useful, why tell it to me at all?"
This is why Socrates was a great philosopher & held in such high esteem.
Use this triple filter each time you hear loose talk about any of your loved ones :)

Source

Blackmailer jailed for using photos to get sex and money from woman

 Rot in jail!!

A blackmailer who repeatedly raped a woman and pocketed her life savings after threatening to publish lingerie photos of her has been jailed for 17 years.

In passing sentence on Daood Hussain at Birmingham Crown Court Judge Peter Carr, said “You treated her, on the evidence that I have heard, in a demeaning and degrading fashion and with complete contempt.

"The prosecution were right in their submission to the jury in that you were a man who wanted control and you were not going to take no for an answer from her.

"You also made a demand for £10,000 which she paid.

"Again you threatened that you would distribute the documents I have already referred to.”

And the judge said the effect of releasing the pictures would have had a “potentially devastating” effect on the victim and her family within their community.

Hussain, 28, of St Andrews Road, Bordesley Village, an unemployed electrical engineer, had denied but was found guilty of blackmail and 12 charges of rape by a jury following a trial.

The defendant was ordered to register as a sex offender for an indefinite period and was also banned from contacting the victim or her family on his release from jail.

In a police interview the woman said Hussain had demanded she meet him during the summer of 2012.

He showed her a leaflet he had made which included pictures of her in lingerie, along with her address and telephone number with a caption advertising her as a prostitute.

She then agreed to meet him ten times for sex sessions in the run up to Ramadan, in June and July 2012, sometimes in his car and other times at various hotels around Birmingham.

The woman eventually complained to the police.

Farah Ramzan, defending, said “He is the youngest of six siblings and comes from a very close knit family. Clearly this is going to have a devastating effect on the whole family.”

Source

Extinguish Your Sins! - Omar Suleiman - Quran Weekly

On Sex

The subject of today's khutba is sex, which is the sort of topic where everybody's voice truly matters, because it is something so fundamental to human experience. But as a lecturer or a khatib, it is a one-way conversation, and I can only tell it like I see it. So listen to what I have to share with a grain of salt, and feel free to share with me any thoughts, feelings, ideas and criticisms you might have of what I say. May Allah grant me to say what is right and true in a beautiful manner, and forgive me at the moments when I inevitably stray, ameen!

I begin with a hadith. In the chapter on marriage in Sahih Muslim, it states that Abu Sa'id al-Khudri (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that Allah's Messenger (may Allah send peace and blessings upon him, his wives, and their children) said, "The most wicked among the people in the eye of Allah on the Day of judgment is the man who goes to his wife and she comes to him, and then he divulges her secret." This hadith establishes the sanctity and reverence which we must have for sex, because it involves the sharing of that which is most intimate between two souls. Just as if someone came to us with a deep secret, we wouldn't go broadcasting it, so too do we not broadcast the secrets shared between a husband and wife.

The sanctity of sex is also revealed in the nature of some of the legal rulings associated with it. For example, there is capital punishment in the Shari'ah for the married adulterer. And although it is virtually impossible to actually convict someone of this crime if they do not themselves confess, the severity of the punishment indicates the severity of the crime in the eyes of Allah. The punishment for the person who is unmarried and convicted of fornication is less than that of the married person, but it is still severe. The physical act is exactly the same, but whereas with one person it brings reward, with the other it brings punishment. The Prophet (may peace and blessings be upon him) taught, in a hadith related in Sahih Muslim, that making love with one's spouse is a virtuous deed. His companions were astounded and asked, “O Messenger of Allah, if one of us fulfills his desire, is there reward in that?” He replied, “Do you not see that if he does so in a haram way he will have the burden of sin? So if he does so in a halal way, he will have a reward for that.”

God warns against prohibited sex in the Qur'an with the same wording that God chose to warn our grandfather and grandmother Adam and Hawwa (may peace be upon them) about the tree, "Do not even come near it (la taqrabuu)." This reminds us that sex is incredibly special, powerful and can have major ramifications in our lives. But unlike the tree in Jannah, we are allowed to taste sex during our journey here on Earth. But we may only do so in the way that God allows us to do so. Sexual expression is myriad, just as is human expression in general. And so adhering to the limits of that which is permissible is what defines us as servants of God as opposed to servants of our own desires and imaginations. As the Qur'an states


"Have you seen the one who takes their own desire as a god?!" (Surah al-Furqan, verse 43)

We worship the Creator of sex, the One who made it the way it is. When we engage in it, we do so with the intention to be thankful to God for what God created, seeking the reward that God gives to those who obey the limits of God. For God has placed clear limits. We are not allowed to have sex when we want - in Ramadan during the day and in ihram we are forbidden from doing so. We are not allowed to have sex with whomever we want, and the rulings related to this are well-known by Muslims all over the world. We are not allowed to have sex however we want - certain sexual acts are haram in and of themselves, regardless of who does them. But sex in and of itself is good, and Islam encourages us to seek halal ways to experience it.

The taste that we develop for sex in adulthood - for it is not with us when we are children, which we often forget after the transformative experience of puberty - should lead us to an awareness of the infinite bliss potential of Jannah, and it is precisely the legal rulings associated with sex which allow us to do so. Our time here on Earth is to see whether we will obey God, or whether we will rather obey the desire which is inside of us. This is why the Shari'ah is so essential. Everything on this earth will ultimately pass away, for the march of civilization is temporary. But Heaven is not like that - Heaven is a place of pure, unrestrained enjoyment for all eternity. It is a place of never-ending ascent to the reality of Allahu akbar, wherein everything that is possible in this universe is unleashed beyond our comprehension. The Qur'an is quite explicit in a variety of places about describing Heaven in sexual terms. Because enjoyable sex is one of the most amazing things a human being can experience on Earth, so its exalted mirror image in Heaven will be truly indescribable. But the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, in a hadith related in Sahih Muslim, that, "the Garden is surrounded by hardships and the Fire is surrounded by temptations," and we must remember that.

If we are not married yet, we have no choice but to be patient. Allah has made the nikah the thing that separates the lawful from the unlawful, the rewarded from the punished. And what is a nikah? It is a solemn agreement between two people that they will share that intimacy and all that comes with it. There are witnesses, so it is public. There is a gift to the bride, so it shows the seriousness of the commitment. There is a party (the recommended walima), so it is communal. It establishes rights and duties, and is the basis for the preservation of the family structure from which human beings come. God says in the Qur'an:


"O humanity, have a reverential awareness of your Lord which impacts your behavior, for God is the One who created you from one soul, and created from it its mate, and from those two spread forth many men and women..." (Surah al-Nisa, verse 1)

One of the 5 main purposes of the Shari'ah is the preservation of lineage, so that every child would know who its father is and who its mother is. The nikah is the basis for ensuring that is the case, because for all the pleasure that sex can bring between a man and a woman, it is also about creating children. God chose sex to be the means by which He brings new souls into this world, which is an enormous thing when we reflect on it, and is one of the reasons for the sanctity of sex. So the nikah shows that we are serious about the potential consequences. But it is not just the physical consequences. It is also the emotional ones. When our lover gets sick, do we abandon them because they are a burden? When our lover is sad, do we turn away from them because we are searching for our own happiness? When our lover is stressed, do we ignore them because we want to relax? No, the reality of sex is such that it should increase us in attachment to our lovers precisely at the most challenging times. Otherwise, despite what our words may claim, the truth is that we are just using them for their bodies.

So in the Islamic tradition, if we are not ready to get married, we are not ready to have sex. But the way we approach sex before we are married can have a deep impact on how we treat sex within marriage. Just because we can't have halal sex right now doesn't necessarily mean that our sexuality is dormant. So if we are conditioning ourselves every day to see each other as nothing more than physical objects created for our enjoyment, then how will we learn to be lovers who follow the Sunna and seek excellence in our sex lives? Unfortunately, we live in a culture where sex is very often presented as a commodity, and it is detached from its sacred origins. But we must give the best of ourselves, and check our selfish tendencies, so that we may honor the gift of sex. Just as we wish to be fulfilled, so too must we desire to fulfill the needs of others.

We should begin with endeavoring to truly connect and communicate with another human being, which is something that ultimately makes our sex lives more beautiful. The Prophet Muhammad (upon him peace) said, in a hadith related by al-Daylami, "One of you should not fulfill one's need from one's spouse like an animal, rather there should be between them foreplay with kissing and words." We forget, or overlook, that the Prophet (peace be upon him) was a deeply sexual being, and part of his Sunnah is to teach us to discover that in our lives. The Prophet (may God bless him) taught them what they shouldn't do, but he also taught them what they should do. In some narrations, the Sahaba (may God bless them for their realness) even asked him for advice about sexual positions! As one of my teachers once said, when I prefaced a question with the idea that it was a little embarrassing, "nothing in the deen is embarassing." It covers the whole of our lives. We should not be embarrassed about sex, but we should hold it sacred. There is big difference between the two. In the first case, we think that sex is something to be shied away from, as if it is somehow not part of our ethical and spiritual selves. In the second case, we recognize that sex is a proof of God's generosity and beauty, and a reminder of Heaven, and therefore to be cherished and given our best. Muslims have always striven for excellence (ihsan) in every endeavor, in compliance with the Prophetic teaching, and it should be no different with sex. Perhaps that is one of the reasons why medieval Christians and Victorian European colonialists were so fascinated and obsessed with Muslim sexuality!

One of the tools we can use to put things in their proper place is to see physical beauty as a temporary manifestation of al-Musawwir, the name of God that pertains to how God fashions human beings and other creations. God says

"He created the heavens and earth in truth, and fashioned you, and made your forms excellent, and to Him is the return." (Surah al-Taghabun, verse 3)

A beautiful person does not create their beauty - God does. And at some point, God will take away that beauty through sickness, old age, or death. It is an inevitable fact. So too the power of a powerful person. It is a temporary manifestation of al-Qawi, the Powerful One, and one day that person will lose what they thought was theirs to wield, through old age, sickness, or death. So if we happen to be attracted to the beauty and/or power of another human being, one of the best ways to move beyond delusion is to remember that they do not own or control that which we are attracted to. God is ultimately the source of all beauty and power. So if we can see God's work present in that which we desire, we can more quickly remind ourselves of the limits that God has made, as well as remember that what we truly want is somewhere else. If in our short lives here on Earth we can mold ourselves to not worship temporary manifestations of attractive qualities when we are forbidden from doing so, but instead worship the Creator of those qualities by only going after them when allowed to do so by God's Shari'ah, it shows that our faith is real and we have put things in their proper place. God is the Rich (al-Ghani), the All-Knowing (al-Aleem), and the Protector (al-Hafeedh), so we must remember that our lover, or the one we want to be our lover, is ultimately poor, dim-witted, and unable to defend us, unless it be that God covers their deficiencies with Divine perfections. And the longing for the bliss of the Hereafter is the longing for experiencing those perfections without limit or end. Just as al-Musawwir has formed us here on Earth, so too will God form us again in Jannah. If we think the men or women we desire are amazing now, then if we were to experience what they will be like in Jannah, we would give up an entire lifetime with them here for a moment with them there.

But this can be the hardest thing in the world, because we have not seen Jannah, and desire is very real and can overwhelm the best of our intellect and spiritual longing. We can make so many mistakes, and fall down so many times. But we have to keep picking ourselves up and keep trying to keep the limits, whether before marriage or in marriage. And once we have kept the limits, we have to keep striving for excellence. When Yusuf (alayhis salam) was exonerated and released from prison, he said, "I do not absolve myself of blame." Some of the scholars of Qur'anic exegesis say that he said this in order to show that, even though he was a Prophet, he was not above temptation. So do not despair and know that this is part of the human struggle - indeed it is one of the most essential parts of it. Islam does not have a monastic ideal because sex is ultimately an amazing thing and was an important part of the lives of most of the Prophets, may peace be upon all of them. We are not trying to rid ourselves of the sexual drive, but rather control it and direct it in a way that enhances the beauty that God has already made manifest in the sexual act.

Real, loving, passionate, mutually fulfilling sex between a husband and a wife is what Islam encourages us towards. If achieving that seems unappealing for any reason, then a life of celibacy can be considered as an alternative. Many famous Muslims who lived exemplary lives of worship, scholarship and sacrifice for the deen were celibate, either by choice or circumstance. Imam al-Nawawi (may God have mercy on him) was probably the most famous of them, and the books he produced are still providing guidance for Muslims every day around the world. But if the sex of the Sunna is something we want, yet it seems far away, or seems like it has so many roadblocks, then we must keep trying. Keep trying to keep ourselves pure. Keep trying to find a spouse who will be good for us in this world and the next. And if we have a spouse, we must keep trying to elevate the connection between us, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

I guarantee you that you will fail in this endeavor, most likely many times. You will make mistakes. You will feel guilty. You will feel awkward. You will feel misunderstood. You will feel like it is too much of a struggle. But it we stop trying to do the right thing, and stop trying to treat other human beings in the right way, and stop trying to be thankful for the beauty that God has placed in this world, then we will just fall deeper into the darknesses that Islam was meant to lead us out of, and we will never reach the point where everything falls into place and we realize why God made us the way He did, how He did, when He did, and why He surrounded us with certain souls. Was not Muhammad for Khadija and Khadija for Muhammad, for all eternity, from the moment their souls were created by God (may everlasting peace and blessings envelop the Prophet, his wives, and their children)!

Our struggles in this arena of life are not disconnected from our worship of our mutual Creator, and in any situation that we find ourselves in with regards to our sexual desire, we should do the following when we feel frustration or worry:

• Make du'a to Allah
• trust in Allah
• try to do good for the sake of Allah
• be patient with what Allah has decreed
• repent to Allah, even if we are not sure we have made a mistake
• look to the eternal pleasure that Allah grants in Heaven only to those He loves, before we look to the temporary pleasure of this world that Allah grants to both those He loves and those He does not

If we can do this, then God will take care of the rest, and tawakkul, trust in God, will become more real than it is has ever been. We will have found good in our situation regardless of the apparent outcome. Then we can hope with a real hope (al-raja') that He will manifest for us "and surely He is going to give you and you will be well pleased (wa la sawfa yu'tika rabbuka fa tarda)" [Surah al-Duha, verse 5]. And for the one to whom God promises to give, what else could they ever need or want.

ma sha' Allah la quwwata illa billah wa'l-hamdu lillahi rabb al-'alameen.

 

Source

Sins...

HADITH OF THE DAY: WHAT IS FAITH? WHAT IS SIN?

A person once asked the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him): "What is faith?" He replied: "When a good deed becomes a source of pleasure for you and an evil deed becomes a source of disgust for you, then you are a believer." The person then asked: "What is a sin?" The Prophet said: "When something pricks your conscience, give it up."

Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 8

Allah's mercy-SubhanAllah!

Coming upon a tree with withered leaves, the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) struck it with his staff, and the leaves were scattered. He then said: (Saying) 'Praise be to God; Glory be to God; There is no god but God; and God is most great,' causes a person's sins to fall away just as the leaves of that tree were falling." - Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 737

Did Jesus (AS) really die for our sins?

HADITH OF THE DAY: GOOD CAN COME FROM HARDSHIP

The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "When God wants to be good to someone, He tries him with hardship."

The Prophet also said: "For every misfortune, illness, anxiety, grief, or hurt that afflicts a believer - even the pain caused by the pricking of a thorn - God removes some of his sins."

Fiqh-us-Sunnah, Volume 4, Number 1

HADITH OF THE DAY: THE GATES OF HEAVEN ARE OPENED DURING RAMADAN

The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "Ramadan, a blessed month, has come to you during which God has made it obligatory for you to fast. In it, the gates of Heaven are opened [and] the gates of hell are locked. ... He who is deprived of its good has indeed suffered deprivation."

Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 611

The Prophet also said: "Whoever fasts the month of Ramadan with faith, and seeks God's pleasure and reward, will have his previous sins forgiven."

Fiqh-us-Sunnah, Volume 3, Number 109

HADITH OF THE DAY: GOD'S MERCY IS NOT LIMITED

The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) recited: "My servants who have transgressed against their souls (through sinning should) not despair of God's mercy, for God pardons all sins." (Quran, 39:53)

Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 745

The Prophet also quoted the devil as saying to God: "I shall continue to lead Thy servants astray as long as their spirits are in their bodies." God replied: "(And) I shall continue to pardon them as long as they ask My forgiveness."

Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 742