Can we stop comparing marriages of our parents and grand parents to our marriages? Feminism and liberalism is NOT the issue, women have learnt to identify abuse, women are independent and women don't put up with gaslighting anymore. Women have also realised its harmful for children to grow in an abusive household and the idea of "kids need both their parents" is farce. Kids need happy, sane and healthy parents.
Please stop labelling women as "impatient". And rather teach men to level up, treat women better, stop expecting women to be their second mothers.
Longevity of a marriage does not equal a successful marriage. Some of the most broken children come from marriages that went on longer than they should have.
Where the women put up with abuse because she had no other option.
The condescending and emotionally ignorant jibes from these boomers gotta stop like yesterday.
It's always better to be single and alone than to be in a relationship, to be abused, used and be alone.
Women realizing their self worth and not putting up with abuse is the reason most marriages aren't working. Teach men to be less abusive, better at communication and to lay out all expectations before marriage so women can make informed decisions.
If you want her to cook for entire family, if she will have to ask mother in law for her expenses, if she has to ask all members of the family before leaving home, if she has to hand over her salary to father in law, if she has to keep quiet when someone in your family hits her children, if she has to give up her job, if she has to share a bathroom with other family members and your brothers. If she has to handover her gold to her mother in law, if her marriage gold will be given away to your sister in her marriage.
Lay all these things out in the open. Instead of putting her through this after marriage.
Before someone says "not all men" - "enough men" to make this status. Also most men know nothing about their brothers or male friends or how they are behind closed doors with the women of their family. So before you stand up for your mate make sure you truly know him.
IMPORTANT - Yes I know happens to men too. But happens way more especially in desi communities to women.
From the Ideal Muslimah
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